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Quote (Squirrel Kid) vs Conker
Boomstick: Did you ever wish something you needed would just magically appear in front of you so you could use it for stuff? Wiz: These two have abilities to help them do just that. Boomstick: Quote, The infamous wacky Kirby O.C. Wiz: And Conker, Rarewares crazy little red squirrel. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And we're here to analyze their weapons armor and skills to see who would win in one of the most random DEATH BATTLES out there! Conker (Cue Windy theme) Wiz: This little alcoholic squirrel has been conquering evil since the Gameboy. Boomstick: Yes-sir-ee! This Guy is awesome! Let’s talk about his powers! Wiz: His weapons of choice are a Frying Pan, a Slingshot- Boomstick: BORING. Wiz:-, a Chainsaw, some guns, and anything his little mind can think of. Boomstick: Whoa! NOT BORING! Wiz: The context-sensitive “Ting” ability lets him pull out weapons when he needs them most. Boomstick: I looked at his list of powers some more and found that he can turn into an anvil and slam into the ground. Wow. Wiz: Besides that Conker can spin his Tail around in the air and hover for a bit. Boomstick: Oh hey Tails, when did you get here? Wiz: Time for his his weaknesses: He isn’t that fast, he is slightly more durable than Quote but only by a bit, and he isn’t very patient. Boomstick: Watch out world, Conker’s got an arsenal of weapons and he’s not afraid to use em’! Conker: Well how about that? Quote (Cue Gourmet Race theme) Wiz: Despite looking like Kirby, he has very different powers. Boomstick: His main ability is to paint pictures of Characters and objects which will then appear out of thin air. Wiz: And when he’s not conjuring up armies, he can usually be seen using his Paint bucket as a cannon. Boomstick: And? Wiz: What do you mean and? Boomstick: What are his other powers? Wiz: He only has 2. Boomstick: Well that’s unfair. Wiz: I’m not sure you get it. By now, I’m betting you’re used to having characters with tons of abilities at their disposal. Boomstick: What are you trying to say? Wiz: I’m saying that Quote doesn’t need many abilities because he barely fights his own battles. Think of him as more of a Pokemon trainer than a fighter. His summoned fighters battle for him. When they need help he can always upgrade them. (Example: if he covers a Sonic clone with paint, he’ll turn into Super Sonic) Boomstick: Wouldn’t that make this a stomp? Wiz: No, because his clones go down easily. Boomstick: I’m confused…just skip to his weaknesses. Wiz: He's kind of a troll and when you take away his Paintbrush and his bucket, he’s got no powers at all and can be easily defeated. Boomstick: He’s also got an uncontrollable addiction to KFC. Kinda like my ex-wife. Wiz: Finally, he doesn’t have as much durability as other people from his species like Meta-Knight or Kirby. Boomstick: Whatever. I just wanna see this little marshmallow out on the battlefield. Quote: Derp. :3 Pre-fight Wiz: The combatants are set. Let's settle this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a DEATH BATTLE! (Setting: A Grass Plain) Conker: Hey lil' guy who are you? Quote: *Ignores him and eats his KFC* Conker: Hello? Quote: *Slaps him across the face* Lol. Conker: That's it bub, you're gonna regret you did that! FIGHT Death Battle Quote shoots blasts of paint at Conker, and Conker jumps up and dodges them. Quote summons Agumon, MegaMan, and Banjo. Conker: This is gonna be one of those days… Conker hits Banjo with his slingshot causing him to disappear. Conker evades a mega buster blast and a barrage of Pepper Breath attacks, and shoots them with his Pistols. Conker: Get over here you little runt! Conker runs over and slams Quote with his Frying pan, knocking him back. Quote recovers and summons Shadow, Pit, Evee, and Black Widow. Conker manages to get hit by a Chaos Spear, and falls face first onto the floor. “”Ting!”” Conker summons a Bomb and quickly runs away, leaving it there to explode. “”BOOM”” Conker chases after quote, who is now flying around on a jetpack. Quote shoots out Paint blasts at Conker. “”Ting!”” Conker summons a shield to protect himself. Quote gets angered and gets out an R.P.G. to shoot at Conker. Conker: Hey now, watch where you shoot that thing! Conker throws his shield at the jetpack, causing Quote to plummet towards the ground. Quote then summons a Brick wall to hide behind. Conker: What an idiot, I can just walk right behind it- Quote was nowhere to be found. In his place was a portal. Conker: Why I’d oughta… Conker jumps through the portal in hopes of finding Quote. (Setting: Sonic the Hedgehog vs Spider-Man) Conker: Oh great, that idiot sent us to another Death Battle. Quote is seen on top of a building with an army of Pac-Men. Conker: Oh great. “”Ting!”” Conker gets out a Grenade and throws it on top of the building, but suddenly… “”THUMP”” Conker: Agh! It’s raining freaking Fire Hydrants! Conker Scurries along dodging the army’s Fire Hydrants. “”Ting!”” Conker had pulled out a jetpack. He flew up and shot the Pac-Men with a Machine Gun. Quote was seen using one of them as a Meat-Shield. Quote painted a portal and jumped in. Before Conker went after him, he saw Super Sonic standing next to Spider-Mans dead body. Conker: You might wanna hide that thing. Sonic nodded and waved good-bye. (Setting: Yoshi vs Kazooie) Conker: Of course I have to go to the fight where the Rareware character loses… Quote attacks Conker by surprise and whacks him with a Steel pipe. Conker: Urk- “”K.O.?”” “”Ting!”” Conker is seen holding a Rocket Launcher. Conker: When you shot me with that paint all those times, I got some on my tail. I “”Ting’d!”” a paintbrush and made a clone. Quote summons a red Pikmin and throws it at his face. Conker punches it off his face, causing its ghost to fly off. Conker: Now where did he go…Oh for the love of- Conker is seen staring at another portal. Conker hops in. (Setting: Pinkie Pie vs Deadpool) Quote is seen talking to Deadpool and Pinkie. Deadpool: This fight was totally a rip-off! Pinkie: Yeah! You just replaced us with an Alcoholic squirrel and a Kirby O.C.! Conker walks over to Quote. They both nod at each other. Quote makes a Giant Laser cannon, Super Silver, and Hulk. “”Ting!”” Conker pulls out a Machine gun. They look at Deadpool and Pinkie. The next part was too violent to be talked about. Conker and Quote sit on Tony’s couch. Quote is seen eating KFC and Conker is seen drinking beer. Wiz: Hey this can’t be how the fight ends! Boomstick: Yeah, you two! You gotta kill each other! Quote creates a stack of 100 dollar bills and hands it to Wiz. Wiz: Never mind. “”K.O.??????”” Results Wiz: Um…the winner is the power of Money. Boomstick: So…This was pretty evenly matched and Quote and Conker tied. Wiz: Welp. Back to the drawing boards to think of a fight that won’t involve us…well, getting involved. Winner: Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:'OC vs Character' Themed What-If? Death Battles Category:Joke Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? Death Battles Category:'Video Games vs Web Shows' themed Death Battles Category:What-If? Death Battles completed in 2015